My booksMy fictionMy filmsTwitter

Wednesday, January 19, 2005

This is me - this is who I am.

You wanna know about me - you wanna know me, really, really know me? Brace yourself, because this is gonna get nasty, this is gonna get personal, this is gonna be me.

Brutal honesty normally isn't my thing - but today it is. Don't ask me why - it just is. No more hiding behind savage satire, merry metaphors, clever critique and a walloping wall of side-splitting sarcasm.

This is me; naked.

  • I'm a very materialistic person - my materialism sometimes amazes even me. I am happy with, and , to some degree, proud of my own material possessions, but I can be jealous of other peoples' possessions. This is me - this is who I am.
  • I have a stutter - sometimes severe, sometimes non-existant, but always looming in the back of my mind, keeping me from saying the things I really want to say; keeping me, often, from being who I want to be, from being who I am. This is me - this is who I am.
  • I lie - I'm good at it, too. It's often so much easier than telling the elaborate truth. I lie to people I know, I lie to people I like and I lie to people I love. Often. Too often. This is me - this is who I am.
  • I have few real friends - I lost many alleged friends in an incident a long time ago, and I never felt like making new ones. I did, though. I have a handful of real friends, who I really appreciate. But I never tell them that. This is me - this is who I am.
  • I'm a closed book - I never really talk about myself, not even to friends. I don't let people get to close to me, see me for who I am, because I am afraid they won't like what they'll find and walk away. This is not likely, but not unlikely either. This is me - this is who I am.
  • I often feel like I'm fooling the world - living with a girlfriend I don't deserve to be with; having friends who should, in their right minds, spend their times better; following an education that's simply over my head. The thing is, nobody's noticed it. Yet.
This is me - this is who I am.

Cheers

15 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

People will have to appreciate you for who you are, accepting your flaws, your good and bad sides all alike, same as you will accept theirs. That is what friendship is all about.
-x-

12:24 pm  
Blogger Martin said...

I wasn't fishing for compliments, but thank you none the less.

Cheers

12:48 pm  
Blogger Martin said...

I was tempted, you know - had already taken the photograph and all. It just didn't seem fitting.

Good to see you're blogging again, my feathery friend.

Cheers

3:10 pm  
Blogger nique said...

Dude after the naked part I thought you were going to describe your body in detail and talk about odd hairs that are in places they shouldn't be... (whew!)

i have a lot of the same traits as well. it's interesting when you face the facts of who you are and are able to admit to your not so admirable characteristics. no one is perfect that is for sure!

3:26 pm  
Blogger Tim said...

This was an unexpected post. Very interesting.

But, I can't help but ask the question, are you lying?

3:34 pm  
Blogger Martin said...

Chicken - I'm not switching, mate. I finally got the neccesary HTML for this blog (somewhat) figured out; I'll be buggered if I start all over again.

Are they paying you, or what?

Nique - The nakedness was figuratively. Nobody's perfect - amen to that.

Tim - Can't all be fun and games, can it? And no, this was all 100% true.

Cheers

5:04 pm  
Blogger Martin said...

I am an enigma even to myself but nice to know you Martin. I salute your bravey.

Best Wishes
La Luna

11:16 pm  
Blogger cedia said...

Martin, you fff...fliii... flippp...flipping stu.. stu..stutter!? I feel you. I'm gonna say something I'll never repeat again.. I'm very mmm... mil...mild...mildly guilty of that that.

So in a few words. Materialistic lying, stuttering stanley, anti-socialist fool. Great to know you better.

I just need to know if you have 10 fingers or 11. That picture with a second thumb really gave me the chills.

5:07 am  
Blogger Martin said...

Cedia - "Materialistic lying, stuttering stanley, anti-socialist fool."

I never said anything about being a fool.

And how can you 'be guilty' of having a stutter - it's not particularly something you do on purpose, is it?

And just 10 fingers, Cedia - don't let your imagination run wild.

Cheers

1:42 pm  
Blogger Pep said...

Hey where'd my frikkin comment go????
:(

This is quite a brutally honest, and a little poingant list, Martin. I really admire that.

Now all we need is a name and face....

:)

2:37 pm  
Blogger Martin said...

You got a name; you ain't gettin' a face.

Think ruggedly handsome yet distuingished features.

Cheers

4:14 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Jeez there Marty Boy you sounded like a manic depressive for a minute there :)

That being said, brutal honesty sometimes helps matters - and I would like to add my name to the growing list who were glad that there was no naked photo attached :D

For a little bit of brutal honesty back at'cha, you sound to me like a very normal, well-balanced person, just one thats a little more open than everyone else about it.

Phil (Yes, that one, the one you cant remember)

1:48 pm  
Blogger Martin said...

Awww, geez! Come here, you big lummox you, and give me a hug!

Cheers

3:43 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Get off, get off

*Throws Ice in the way*

Hug her instead, she'll appreciate it more :D

Phil

11:20 am  
Blogger Martin said...

As will I, you know, with the presence of tits and all.

Cheers

11:43 am  

Post a Comment

<< Home