World peace can wait, this is more urgent.
First, there was the 'wide mouth' beercan, a beercan with a bigger opening through which you can drink. I found (and still find) this the single most ridiculous invention ever, in the history of ridiculous inventions. I mean, just how impatient are you, if the beer isn't coming out of the can fast enough?!
I think I've just lost all faith in humanity. Excuse me, I have to go watch some German porn to restore it.
Cheers
| But, lo and behold, something equally silly has been invented. Smokers, breathe easy (if you still can) — technology has finally solved the pressing problem of not being able to light up on a windy day, because Israeli company Gashbam Enterprises has invented the (..sigh..) self-lighting cigarette. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, the self-lighting cigarette. A cigarette .. that lights .. itself. There you go, smokers — the risk of getting cancer and dying a horrible death remains, but at least you will no longer be at risk of singeing your eyebrows while trying to light up in a wind tunnel. |
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14 Comments:
That should be fun! You could sneak up to people, have it light up (no need for matches, so no attention drawn to yourself) and burn their asses!
Yay.
German is your quintessential porn language.
You go around burning asses often, do you?
Speaking of burning asses, back to my German porn.
Cheers
No, but I would if I could get my hands on some self-lighting cigarettes. As it is, I'll just keep slapping asses instead.
Schnell, schnell, die Vaseline! Mein Arsch knellt! ;)
Isn't it supposed to do that? Why else would one ..
.. ah never mind!
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i don't speak any language but English! So would i understand the german porn?
i suck! But Martin, it's all good!
& W0t 4b0ut 733T p0rn? That's a language too, and you'd be able to understand it, right?
Then again... Subtitled porn?
Nique - the fact that you don't speak German makes the German porn so much better. Trust me. It's all .. argh!
Lies - subtitled porn; there's a nasty idea.
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Nope, even German porn couldn't restore my faith in humanity, and trust me, I tried.
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I just hate it when my porn is without subtitles, I always miss what they are saying and fail to see why they end up having sex. I've said hello to a lot of girls and I have never ended up having sex with them.
I think I'll have to start smoking now, the only reason I didn't before was that you have to carry a lighter with you at all times. This problem has now been solved and I can now get to die sooner and more painfully. What would we do without such inventions.
Hmm, odd - everytime I say 'hello' to a girl, we end up having frantic sex every single time.
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Guess I'm just saying it wrong then or perhaps it's just your raw sexual magnetism.
I'm guessing it's both. And, of course, the fact that I'm ruggedly handsome.
Of course.
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I'm bored. Write something already, you ruggedly handsome man.
I will.
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