Oh, the horror!
This is slightly related to Pep's latest post about the Monday/Sunday feeling.
One of the things I hate most in this cruel world, aside from eating-sounds, is the alarmclock. You know the feeling - you're in that warm, cosy bed; it's raining outside; you can hear the wind beating around your house; you pull the sheets up to your eyes and snuggle up to whoever is lying next to you and ..
.. beep beep fucking beep.
You'll agree that that's just terrible.
Want to know what's even worse? You do, don't you? Ok, here goes.
□ □ □ □ □ □
Imagine, if you will, waking up in the middle of the night. The darkness is absolute and the silence of the night envelops you. After a second or two you notice a slight tapping - it's just starting to rain. As you slumber you hear the tapping turn into a drumming, and the wind is just picking up, too - you can hear gusts of wind blowing through the street and against your window. You are not bothered in the slightest.
You pull the sheets up and turn around with a slight smile on your face, because you know it's at least several hours before it's time to get up, before it's 07:00 AM. As you turn you open your eyes the slightest bit, and you catch the gentle, yellowish light coming from that wretched alarmclock standing on your bedside table. You quickly close your eyes, get comfortable and listen to the rain, which is now pelting down on your window. You feel yourself sliding into the warm blanket of sleep.
Then a thought enters your mind.
Your heart skips a beat. Did you just see what you think you saw. Can't be. But you're afraid to open your eyes, to check if in fact you saw what you thought you saw. You're afraid because you know you're right; you're eyes did not deceive you. In the end you decide to check anyway, despite your entire being objecting, your entire mind denying. Slowly, the gentle but ominous yellowish light fills your opening eyes ..
.. and it's 06:54 AM.
You close your eyes again - this time out of despair, as you hear the first flash of lightning breaking the morning sky in half.
□ □ □ □ □ □
This is true horror - horror which bloodthirsty zombies or chainsaw-wielding maniacs can only dream about.
Cheers
One of the things I hate most in this cruel world, aside from eating-sounds, is the alarmclock. You know the feeling - you're in that warm, cosy bed; it's raining outside; you can hear the wind beating around your house; you pull the sheets up to your eyes and snuggle up to whoever is lying next to you and ..
.. beep beep fucking beep.
You'll agree that that's just terrible.
Want to know what's even worse? You do, don't you? Ok, here goes.
□ □ □ □ □ □
Imagine, if you will, waking up in the middle of the night. The darkness is absolute and the silence of the night envelops you. After a second or two you notice a slight tapping - it's just starting to rain. As you slumber you hear the tapping turn into a drumming, and the wind is just picking up, too - you can hear gusts of wind blowing through the street and against your window. You are not bothered in the slightest.
You pull the sheets up and turn around with a slight smile on your face, because you know it's at least several hours before it's time to get up, before it's 07:00 AM. As you turn you open your eyes the slightest bit, and you catch the gentle, yellowish light coming from that wretched alarmclock standing on your bedside table. You quickly close your eyes, get comfortable and listen to the rain, which is now pelting down on your window. You feel yourself sliding into the warm blanket of sleep.
Then a thought enters your mind.
Your heart skips a beat. Did you just see what you think you saw. Can't be. But you're afraid to open your eyes, to check if in fact you saw what you thought you saw. You're afraid because you know you're right; you're eyes did not deceive you. In the end you decide to check anyway, despite your entire being objecting, your entire mind denying. Slowly, the gentle but ominous yellowish light fills your opening eyes ..
.. and it's 06:54 AM.
You close your eyes again - this time out of despair, as you hear the first flash of lightning breaking the morning sky in half.
□ □ □ □ □ □
This is true horror - horror which bloodthirsty zombies or chainsaw-wielding maniacs can only dream about.
Cheers
6 Comments:
Hey Martin,
No, not only in Disney films, but more so in my cold, love infested city. I think I should get through halloween first before I take on any Christmas Love.
Louise
You have just uncovered my absolute worst nightmare. I HATE the alarm clock... "beep beep fucking beep" is right! (and also hilarious)
I trashed our alarm clock and replaced it with a radio.
GOOOOOOODDD MMOORRRNNIIIGGGGGG listeners! This is Bob Mad-Bastard and your listening to whacky WFUCK-FM !!! BEEP BEEP BOOP!! GET UP IT'S A BEEEEEOOOOOTIFUL DAAAYYY!
I FEEL IN A MAD MOOOOD [cow sounds, general farmyard sounds]
GET UP, IT'S A WWWWWWHHHACCCKKKEEEE DAAAAYYYYY!!!
:{
I'm laughing so hard from Mr. Pepperoni's comment, someone sure is a morning person! ; ) I'm not either. Oh and i hope you don't mind my tweaking your name a bit...
07:00 isn't such a bad time to get out of bed. However, 05:00 (my summer job) and 06:00 (school) are. I didn't have to get out of bed until 08:00 today and I honestly felt as if I'd won the lottery. Sadly enough, I didn't really win the lottery... The underground went on a strike today and ah... Bad day after all.
— Lies
Thank goodness for sick leave. Oh yeah Baby!! It's called my I-was-too-afraid-to-ask-for-vacation-time-off-so-I-call-it-in-as-a-sick-day.
Love it!
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