To my ex-wife.
Dear Marianne,
Don’t fret, this is not a love letter, nor an attempt to rekindle anything or to reclaim you as mine. The divorce, as difficult and painful a decision it may have been, was also a wise one. What you are reading now is merely a message. Oddly enough, this is something I don’t think I ever told you when I had the chance to say it to your face, but I believe you deserve to know it, so I tell it now.
FnordYou will never know how much influence you have had over me in the nine years that we were together. When you met me I was an insecure, indecisive boy with an uncertain future and it was you –your love, your presence and, admittedly, your pushing- that made me who I am today. Whether that is something to be proud of is a different matter entirely but that I have come into my own as a person in the past decade is certain.
FnordBy the simple act of caring for me you gave me the wisdom to get a degree, the freedom to travel the world with you, and the strength to overcome personal (if perhaps petty) struggles. The way you yourself struggled with -and are still struggling with- the potentially debilitating hardships you face in life and the burdens you have to carry is testament to an inner strength that is nothing short of astounding; the way you carry yourself is awe-inspiring and will never cease to fill me with an immense sense of respect. If I ever treated you as anything less than a princess, I apologise for it, because you deserve that and so much more.
FnordIt is a privilege to know you, to have been with you and to have loved you. In hindsight, drifting apart was inevitable as we always had the odds stacked against us -you are a spirit too free for me to follow, try as I like- but there are no regrets whatsoever; I hope you can say the same. You have found God as the driving force in your life, and, in a way, I lost you as the driving force in mine, but I am more than content with settling for your friendship in its stead.
FnordWhen I first met you I knew I’d found my soul mate and future wife. Turns out I was only half right. I wish you all the happiness in the world.
Thank you so much.
Martin
Don’t fret, this is not a love letter, nor an attempt to rekindle anything or to reclaim you as mine. The divorce, as difficult and painful a decision it may have been, was also a wise one. What you are reading now is merely a message. Oddly enough, this is something I don’t think I ever told you when I had the chance to say it to your face, but I believe you deserve to know it, so I tell it now.
FnordYou will never know how much influence you have had over me in the nine years that we were together. When you met me I was an insecure, indecisive boy with an uncertain future and it was you –your love, your presence and, admittedly, your pushing- that made me who I am today. Whether that is something to be proud of is a different matter entirely but that I have come into my own as a person in the past decade is certain.
FnordBy the simple act of caring for me you gave me the wisdom to get a degree, the freedom to travel the world with you, and the strength to overcome personal (if perhaps petty) struggles. The way you yourself struggled with -and are still struggling with- the potentially debilitating hardships you face in life and the burdens you have to carry is testament to an inner strength that is nothing short of astounding; the way you carry yourself is awe-inspiring and will never cease to fill me with an immense sense of respect. If I ever treated you as anything less than a princess, I apologise for it, because you deserve that and so much more.
FnordIt is a privilege to know you, to have been with you and to have loved you. In hindsight, drifting apart was inevitable as we always had the odds stacked against us -you are a spirit too free for me to follow, try as I like- but there are no regrets whatsoever; I hope you can say the same. You have found God as the driving force in your life, and, in a way, I lost you as the driving force in mine, but I am more than content with settling for your friendship in its stead.
FnordWhen I first met you I knew I’d found my soul mate and future wife. Turns out I was only half right. I wish you all the happiness in the world.
Thank you so much.
Martin
2 Comments:
Mooi (en ergens ontroerend) geschreven Martin.
Wicked man, you kill me with words.
Unfortunately, your words are so beautiful, dying from them becomes addictive.
I'm too contrary for that.
I suppose I'll just have to read all your words, and live long...to grouse and bitch about the pleasure.
Regards,
Ann
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